tonight's dinner was company welcome treat to my foreign HR counterparts (they are here for training). nothing can goes wrong with singapore's famous chilli crabs.. not becos i ate alot nor too little, hence my insomnia. but the reality check of seafood dinner - it brings me back to my seafood dinner with darling minwei.. chilli crabs, pepper crabs n even butter crabs.. whatever its presentation tonight, i just could not keep my mind away from those days.. that seafood night.. trust me, i tried as hard as i could to stay sociable and interactive but.. i simply miss minwei.
i know.. in the eyes of all of you who care for me, he's not worthy of my remembrance' but i really love him alot, not to mention he really didnt handle it well.. to sum up, i still miss him.. sometimes i could push these 'reminders' away, but in the face of crabby feast, i really wished he was here with me.. how he enjoyed the chilli crabs, messing his fingers.. how happy he was, his laughter..
listening to 'love songs on class95' is definitely not helping as he (once) enjoyed listening to all these soft lovely songs with me via internet radio.. how he appreciated those opportunities to listen to the same song with me.. gosh, this is so not helping.. hence i decided to switch to my usual classical music, may the strings of violin take these memories into the wind....
as i started to 'relax', another concern arises.. ian... he was kinda upset that his colleague (new friend fr gun club) disclosed that he is currently in a rship.. i questioned him.. it took him 3days to sms back. when he did, he was really concerned for me, abt us.. *j, u r just such sucker under his concern* though i should give him a chance to explain (i'd love to~) but this might just be the 'sign' that i should seriously re-consider his sincerity.
sigh.. from missing minwei to reconsidering ian.. when will my wondering mind ever settle down tonight?.. i really need to sleep, no matter how awake i am..
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