have u ever thought how many lives are struggling in hospitals?
after visiting gwen's dad in SGH, i have to say.. SGH is a place full of memories.. walking up the slope, i wondered how many people was actually happy to walk under the covered pathway (at least i remembered i was in tears the last time i took that path).. at the block lobby, i was reminded of the times when my dad was hospitalised - how one turn in life can affect the rest of the life.. turning into the ward, i saw myself in my previous hospitalisations - how blessed i felt when i survived thru the various ops and infections.. i cant say those are happy memories, but once again, i was reminded how 'small' we human are.. with our so-called advanced technology and medical science, we thought we are able to handle what comes may, only to find out how wrong we are.. it makes me wonder if our Creator is smiling at these immatured assumptions of ours.. afterall, the greatness of dust is still dust..
oh, btw gwen commented something which made me wonder throughout my bus journey home..
she said i'm good with elderly, and i shld be a volunteer to accompany the old folks esp the hospitalised ones. honestly, i've never (seriously NEVER) thought i'd have the patience to hear the old people out (you know, how long-winded they can be with their long ago stories), let alone spending time with them. i've always regard myself to be a 'young' person who connects to youth better than with elderly or even children (that's why i enjoyed serving Amplify ministry). in my view, elderly are stubborn naggers; children are a bunch of rebels lacking in discipline, hence i dont think i have the patience for both of them.. but i guess i've improved~
come to think of it.. perhaps i have to thank my depression..
before that, you know i've been a 'do-it or do-it' person - dun waste my time if you are not taking my advice. i could talk so fast that my tongue had no problem flowing with my racing thoughts; i spoke how i felt to any one that i could be so blunt (bitchy) esp to those i know personally.. but now.. i find it difficult to be chatty in front of people, esp with those i have known so well.. i often find myself holding my tongue while putting up a mental 'STOP' sign to my flooding thoughts, which often results in stammering and in the end, i would rather keep quiet and listen instead.. nothing bad with that, in fact it helps me to be a better listener compared to the noisy (and pushy) vessel i had been.. i learn more things thru listening and i think it trains me up on my patience too.. *who says depression is bad?*
anyway i was surprised to hear that comment.. other than my improving relationship with my 'insolent and egoistic' dad (but he IS my EVER LOVING father!) i didn't think i could tolerate anyone else.. well, tit proves - there are always unexpected lessons at the turn of the road, if only you keep walking :)
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