when my father had stroke in thailand and had to rush back to singapore, yes it was quite dramatic but all of us were so worried.. never was the family so 'united'. the fear of losing my dad, the fear anything might happened to him made me treasure my father more than ever. it was then when it suddenly became obvious that my parents are getting old.. they are no longer the 'young' parents we used to know.. even though they have not been piggy-back us for years, but no longer can they also run or even walk long distance with us.. the reality of life-and-death has never been so real in my face..
recently, it's quite a common news to hear whose and whose father is in hospital due to heart-attack or stroke.. it is now that my not-so-young friends start to realise this truth of aging and ponder on some life questions.. "why give birth and bring another being into this suffering world? afterall, you cant choose not to come into this world, but you can choose if you wan to give birth to another being." "if i have cancer, i'd rather commit suicide than to bring grief to my family with, i want them to be happy" .. sounds similiar? it's no wonder why the Bible says all has sinned. in my opinion, these are really selfish thoughts..
1) why give birth?
of course, it's a very primitive thinking to say 'it's women's duty to give birth' or 'God create women to reproduce'. though it holds some facts of the matter, but that does not mean female is mere 'production factory'. then again, does that mean we have the authority to deny life, deny another human being from being born? trust me, having been-there-done-that, i can tell you there is nothing more miraculous and beautiful than life creation. it's true - they do not have the choice to decide to be born or not, but that does not mean they do not want to be born. each of these life. little as it seems, has a destiny, a purpose on earth. what you deem as a suffering world, is a wonderful world for them to fulfil their dreams, their calling in life. and very often, trust me, they do desire to be born. it's true - every life inside every womb desires to be born. it does not matter if this is your so-called suffering world, because they know they are called to be born here and to make a difference. even though we cannot control how our children might grow into, but at least we grant their very first desire - to be born (the very first parental love).
for those who believe in such comments, i have to say - you are really very selfish. just bcos you are not happy with the life you are in, the things you see, you decide to act as God to deny another person's desire to be fulfilled. and if you continue to deny this life creation, i dare say you are forever a superficial 'stage 1' human being. you can never advance in life to enjoy this love, this miraculous love of life. in another word, in my view, you are not fully human. *sorry but that is how i feel* if i have another chance to be pregnant again, i know i'll go all the way to protect his birth. nothing, absolutely nothing can be more remorseful than deny birth..
2) rather die than to bring grief to family
this is the most absurd thinking, yet many of us harbour it in one way or another..
in the first place, if your family dont feel for your situation, what makes you think they'll grieve for your death? and if they feel, what makes you think they wont grieve after your deliberate death? it's very natural - as much as you feel for them, want them to be happy, they also want you to be happy. yes, it will afflict pain and suffering to them when you are in pain, but as much as they do not want to see you this way, they also want you stay in hope as just they are.
the will to live is very important. even though it's easy for u to let go and die, do you know it's difficult for people around you to live on? yes, life still goes on but can we really 'switch off' and move on? can you? when you stand in hope for your love ones who are struggling, do you not want them to be hopeful as you are? seriously, this statement is so ridiculous that i really cannot coment more. if you really want your family to be happy, stay hopeful even in the toughest struggle. it's not easy, but always remmeber - miracle often comes in the most impossible times.
my dear friends, time is really not in our favour.. my dear friends out there, please really treasure your love ones, esp your parents.. please do not entertain any god-forbidden ideas against life creation/continuation. grow up - be wise to embrace pain. aging and death is a cycle of life - a phrase of equal opportunity where no one can escapes, yet no one has the authority to stop this cycle. it is coming and it will come. treasure your every moment of life, even though scientically your internal organs are failing each moment. *the more you should treasure your body~!* no one can escape aging and death, but your attitude determines the speed it will comes.
Ecclesiastes 3: 1-8
There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven:
a time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to uproot,
a time to kill and a time to heal, a time to tear down and a time to build,
a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance,
a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them, a time to embrace and a time to refrain,
a time to search and a time to give up, a time to keep and a time to throw away,
a time to tear and a time to mend, a time to be silent and a time to speak,
a time to love and a time to hate, a time for war and a time for peace.
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