22 Sep 10 - day 3 of hugging

i survived till wed; tmr is thurs.. and f1 grand prix is happening all around my office block - causing such traffic blockage and jam. despite of all these hipe (and stress), i survive till now. i'm really living by the day now, not wanting to think further than tmr. after all i've been through, tmr may be just my 'recall' day for all i know, just waiting for His recall..

again, i did my hugging rounds and well received by my colleagues and friends. though some are curious on my resolution, nevertheless they welcome this idea of hugz. seriously, who can resist a hug though it's from a boney person? when i sensed i'm getting upset over some issues, i quickly went to my hugging partners. it's better than hiding in the washroom, right?

a lot of thing start from ownself. like ian said, we have to be responsible for our actions and decisions. i totally agree, but this time of 'tribulation' is kinda too hard for me to bear. i know many of you are praying for me to let go and let God.. 'let go and let God' is such familiar phrase and faith i used to have but now.. perhaps godma is right - let me take time to recover, to come back to Him. afterall, you people got to have faith in your prayers - the power of prayers work wonders. *trust me, i experienced it again n again* though i'm not into spiritual stuff now, but i still believe in the power of prayers. so, people, keep your faith strong and prayers fervent - He will answer your prayers.. eventually. :) even ian is holding his faith for me on this..

dont ask me how's my darling now.. cos i dont dare to log into FB.. i miss him, i really do, yet i m also scare of any 'bad news' from him.. i cant face it now, not now. i have to recover from this depression first, before i can stand up.. i'm still crawling.. crawling toward 27Sep where my help - senior psychiatrist appointment. somehow, it gives me comfort that he's 'senior'. not just a normal psychiatrist. i really need help, need expert serious help~

by the way, tonight my sister is of furthest distance from earth. though she is far, but she is just as beautiful as ever.. she saw me thru my tears, my joy, esp my loneliness. just as gentle as she is, she is always here for me. thank you, my dearie sister..